For those looking for a simpler guide of what is an I-message keep on reading. It covers a summary of how to use I-messages, why you use them and why to avoid using you-messages.
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Tags: suggestions, I-messages, You-messages

You might want to read ‘You-messages can work for and against you’ to get the background for this post. I had pointed out that you can have an I-message and a You-message combined like ‘I feel angry when you call me names’. It is common for those new to I-messages to use I feel …(feeling) when you … (behaviour). But an effective I-message does not contain a ‘you’ in it. Read More...

Tags: I-messages, You-messages, feedback, blaming, reinforce

Following on from my previous post ‘How to get your message across respectfully’ the other way we can communicate is using You-messages. In You-messages, the message contains either you or you’re in it. For example, ‘You make me so angry when you don’t clean up after yourself.’ Using a You-messages blames the person for the situation and judges them. So it pays to know when to use one. Read More...

Tags: I-messages, You-messages, feedback, blaming, reinforce