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Materials, tricks and tips that can help!
For those people not sure if the book will help them we can offer some free materials to try. All of it comes straight out of the book Encouraging Appropriate Behaviour: A Six-Step Approach.
Why do you need six steps to encourage appropriate behaviour?
Everyone likes to focus on solutions to problems and so do we. But when you have 20 odd solutions to choose from, how do you know which is the best one? That is why we have six steps, to help work out and narrow down the solutions. Coming up with the best response is not difficult in most cases, but when it is difficult you need all six steps to solve it. The steps help to pin point what the behaviour is, explore when and why it occurs and help work out how best to encourage appropriate behaviour. Read more about the six BECOME steps.
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How to get your message across respectfully
We have all done it. Lost our cool in the heat of the moment and said something that we later regretted. The tool to overcome this is I-messages. It gets the message across about how you feel and what behaviour made you feel that way. All this without sounding like you are blaming them. I-messages is a simple way to communicate in heated situations. But do not confuse simple with easy. It takes skill and practice. Learn more about how to use effective I-messages.
Things to consider in creating behaviour agreements
It is important to have boundaries about what is acceptable and unacceptable behaviour. Otherwise it can become difficult to know when someone has crossed a line. The best way to ensure everyone understands these boundaries is to have an agreement. Now to try and explain every option of what is acceptable or unacceptable is impossible. There just is too many possibilities to cover. That is why you need an agreement with some guiding principles. Want to read what should be in an agreement?
I can respond in 10 different ways?
It can begin to get you down when whatever you do nothing changes. It is useful to be able to mix up your responses. If something is not working you might need to try a different way. We have identified 10 different styles of response. These are placed on a curve to show which responses are more positive and which can lead to more negative outcomes. Take a look at the response style curve.
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Ways to encourage appropriate behaviour
The way you respond to a behaviour that is called a strategy. We discuss in the book 20 common strategies to use and you can combine them to create even more powerful responses. Here are four of our favourite strategies.
Who else can help?
There is generally many different ways to solve a problem. Some ways suit people better than others. Also there are times when problems require specialist help. In the course of writing and researching the book we have come across programs, books, and materials that might be of interest or help to you. So here are some other options.
Visit the help in australia page for information on Australia contacts. Sorry if you reside outside of Australia, you will have to try local searches.
See the other books page for some ideas for other books that might be of interest to you.